Critical Missives #7
Chapter: Comic, Level 2 — Another Notch in the Belt
Rusty & Co.
Monstrous Misadventures! Updated every Wednesday at noon, EST.
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Now it’s time for Law, Chaos, and the Law of Chaos.
Law naturally smells like a matzo cracker.
Chaos = Sushi
Neutral still smells like coffee.
PEDANT_ALERT:
It’s “We paladins…”
(sorry)
She…she’s new.
Incidentally, Law smells like hospitals and reams of copier paper, whereas Chaos smells like cigarette butts, beer, and the strong cologne of the guy sitting next to you at the bar.
… aaaaand I should’ve read the comments above. A-whoops.
I like your version better.
Starbuck’s corporate plan would seem to differ on that regard.
I wonder how she smells X with Y Tendencies. Mmmmm, Neutral with Good Tendencies… Off to go bake some Good-aligned cookies.
Starbucks’ sizes were obviously named by someone of Chaotic alignment. Their smallest size is named Tall. Tall is the exact opposite of small! (And what the hell does “venti” even mean?)
“Venti” is Italian for “twenty”, supposedly because it’s twenty ounces.
Or perhaps because it costs twenty bucks.
Note to any Starbucks executives who might be reading this. That was a joke. A JOKE. You know, things that are funny because they AREN’T real?
… Oh no. What have I done?
Actually, their smallest size is a “Short” but it’s only available for hot drinks and it’s never listed on the menu. Because nothing’s more Chaotic than having a size you don’t tell anyone about.
What made Starbucks turn neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were they just born with a heart full of…neutrality?